Once again sexual addiction is in the news! The recently resigned governor of New York has admitted involvement with prostitutes. Such behavior is more likely the sign of an addiction rather than just a momentary indiscretion.
Sex addicts are not the same thing as sexual predators who abuse minors. Sex addicts spend an inordinate amount of time preoccupied with seeking a sexual high, even though their sexual compulsivity causes serious problems in work and family life, endangers personal health or safety, or risks legal prosecution. Sexual addiction is defined as a brain disease in which the pleasure center of the brain is highjacked, normal thinking is impaired, and compulsive acting out leads to futile attempts to control sexual compulsion.
A conservative estimate of those who meet the criteria for sexual addiction and compulsivity is about 3 to 5 percent of the United States population. This is most likely a very conservative estimate, since these numbers reflect only persons who seek treatment. Based on comparable alcohol and drug statistics, more people suffer from this problem than actually seek treatment.
Sexual compulsivity can manifest in a variety of ways. Many people are addicted to Internet sex. Over 40 million people daily use the Internet for sex, and at least half of these are women. Grade school through college age youth are especially vulnerable. Some 85 percent of college students report that they receive unsolicited ads for sexual material on the Internet. Other forms of sexual addiction include voyeurism, exposure, repeated extramarital affairs and even exchange of pain.
There are two main causes of sex addiction. Simply put, sex is used by the majority of addicts to numb the pain of some trauma the person has experienced. The use of sex to numb emotional pain is similar to the way addicts use drugs or alcohol. The Internet, however, is a visual stimulus that bypasses the thinking part of the brain and more directly stimulates the pleasure center. Consequently, Internet sex, whether pornography or chat rooms, can be addictive even for those who are not trying to numb traumatic life experiences.
No profession or religious group has escaped public scandal over their members acting out of sexual compulsion. Physicians, politicians, lawyers, teachers, therapists, and clergy have been in the news for patterns of sexual acting out that resemble the definition of sexual addiction. Among evangelical Christians alone there are more than 60 self-help organizations for sex addicts.
This summer I will be making my second presentation to a group of national and international Catholic leaders who deal with all forms of addiction among priests and religious; among these is sexual addiction. I also have developed a workshop to teach priests and seminarians how to recognize the signs of sexual addiction while hearing confessions or when doing pastoral counseling.
One of the best ways to begin recovery from sexual addiction is to accept God's healing for the shame it causes in a person's life. The sacrament of penance is designed to replace this shame with God's forgiveness and to foster by the grace of God recovery from the slavery to sexual compulsivity.
If you want to know more about sexual addiction you can call the Society for the Advancement of Sexual Health (SASH) at (866) 226-2722. Or you can access their Web site at www.sash.net. For a list of certified sexual addiction therapists in your area go to the directory and enter your state or your city and state. There are certified sexual addiction therapists in or near our diocese in Springfield, Decatur, Bloomington, Morton, Peoria, and St. Louis.
Father Richard Chiola is a certified counselor, pastor of St. Cabrini Parish in Springfield and diocesan director for the ongoing formation of clergy.